CAG: (n.) An informal meeting to discuss work related topics.
Cake and arse party: (n.) An activity in which none of the participants recognise a purpose. Dick dance, Rolling goat cf. Practice bleed
Canapé*: (n.) Used for comedy effect in place of the word canopy. Eg: I’m ready for the ~ to come down.
Cannon fodder: (n.) A member of the non commissioned ranks of the RAF regiment or the army. A foot soldier. Grunt
Cans: (pl. n.) Carriers Bomb Light Stores (CBLSs) Cobblers
Capacity seat : (n.) The seat in which the instructor sits and can criticise all weaknesses and mistakes because they are not flying the aircraft and being assessed.
Carbon-based life form: (n.) A dehumanising method of referring to the recipients of weapons effects, used in order to shield the user’s conscience from the unpalatable truth. cf Meat bomb
Carrots: (pl. n.) Lit afterburners. Cookers, Heaters
Chaff: (excl.) Warning to others that wind has been passed. Depressurisation
Chaff-head: (n.) A person whose hair has turned almost entirely grey, and therefore resembles the metal threads deployed to fool radars.
Chaffe: (n.) Used to describe an activity that is not enjoyed usually because it is seen as irrelevant or too time consuming.Nause, Ball ache
Change cassette: (v.) Be aware that the discipline into which you are moving requires a different set of skills. Get (something) hat on
Chank: (n.) An intentionally vague combination of ‘Chill’ and ‘Wank’.
Chap: (n.) Term of address generally used by individuals unable or unwilling to remember a person’s name. Fella
Chariot: (n.) One’s bed. From: Wank ~. Pit, Scratcher
Chateau (station or squadron name): (phr.) The squirty bottle of alcoholic solvent used to wipe off writing made with permanent marker.
Chattham House rules: (adj.) Term used to indicate that whatt follows is sensitive information that shouldn’t really be discussed but somehow this phrase unofficially allows the discussion. Bead window
Check in not dig in: (phr.) Description of aircrew accommodation standard when compared to that of the army. Often used as a response to jealous rage from army personnel.
Check six: (v.) Look behind you.
Check the actual*: (v.) A term derived from meteorological terminology used to describe the action of going outside to smoke tobacco products.
Cheese-eating surrender monkey: (n.) A French person. cf Cloggie, Spam, Septic.
Chew the fat: (v.) To have an informal conversation.
Chill herbs: (v.) Decrease one’s state of readiness for the near future. and relax, Hang slack
Chill your beans : (v.) Decrease one’s state of readiness for the near future. And relax, Hang slack, Chill herbs, cf. Standby to standby
Chin it off: (v.) Dispense with something, as it is considered to not be sufficiently important. Gaff off, Kiss off
Chisel : (v.) To influence others who are in a position of relative authority in order to get what one wants. Eg: I managed to ~ my way onto the program.
Chocolate laser live : (adj.) A medical condition that involves diarrhoea .
Chocolate teapot/fireguard: (n.) Something totally useless.
Chop (across) to: (v.) To change frequency. cf. Bell up, Get on the blower to, QSY
Chop along: (v.) To hurry up.
Christmas tree: (n.) A central warning panel in an aircraft that has many lit warning cations on it.
CinC home command : (n.) One’s spouse. Dragon ops, M.R.S, Red Air, Long haired air marshall
Civvy street*: (n.) Civilian life and rules.
Clag and shit : (n.) Very bad weather. Shit and corruption, Shit and derision
Clap hands: (v.) To have an airborne collision. cf. Aluminium death cloud
Clatter of bits: (n.) A disorganised terrible mess. Eg: Its turned into a ~. Tits up, Ball of chalk, Mare, Rolling goat, Cluster fuck, Bag of bits, Tits high
Cleared Off: (v.) Authorised to depart the place of work. Stack
Climb up and level at 2ft 6*: (v.) To go to ones bed.
Cloggie: (n.) A flying Dutchman (sic). cf Spam, Septic
Close of play (COP): (n.) The end of the working day.
Cluster fuck: (sim.) A disorganised terrible mess. Tits up, Clatter of bits, Ball of chalk, Mare, Rolling goat
Cobblers: (pl. n.) Carriers Bomb Light Stores (CBLSs). Cans
Colonel: (blank) The Navy, Army & Airforce Institution(NAAFI), or local on base (SPAR) shop. From ~Gaddafi
Combat egg*: (n.) The shape described by a surface of constant energy required by an aircraft to remain at a certain level of g force. It is shaped like an egg due to the normal acceleration of the earths gravity which gives an extra 1g in the vertical. God’s G
Combat kip*: (n.) A short period of sleep taken on an opportunity basis. cf. Simulated
Combat pyjamas*: (n.) An aircrew flying overall. cf. Combat slipper
Combat slipper*: (n.) An aircrew boot. cf. Combat pyjamas
Combat z’s: (n.) A miraculously reviving quick nap.
Come on to the radar: (v.) To come to the attention of the person speaking, specifically to be of some importance as well. cf. In the frame
Coming out of our arseholes: (phr.) An excess of something. Up the ying yang
Commit aviation: (v.) To go flying.
Container*: (US. n. synon.) Used by US Air Force in place of the word box (the saying of which is a self imposed social taboo).cf. Skulling, Cranium
Contra rotating death banana: (n.) A Chinook helicopter. cf. Cab, Hydraulic palm tree
Cookers: (n.) Afterburners. Carrots, Heaters
Cool and the gang : (stat.) I am pleased with the current situation. Cool for cats, Top banana
Cool as tits : (phr.) Something that is extremely good. Cool and the gang, Cool for cats, Top Banana
Cool for cats : (stat.) I am pleased with the current situation. Cool and the gang, Top banana
Covered off: (adv.) Something adequately organized. Get shit in a pile, Get shit in a sock, Squared away
Crack of: (adj.) A small amount of something. Eg: ~power. Smidge
Crack of a sparrow’s (fart): (phr.) Extremely early in the morning. Dark o’clock, Stupid o’clock, O-dark hundred, O-four fuck’s sake, O-silly hundred, Early doors
Crack on: (v.) Start or continue a particular activity. Press on
Crackers : (n.) 1. A 1000lb bomb. 2. Igniters in a jet engine.
Cranditz: (n.) RAF College Cranwell. Crantanamo Bay
Cranium aspect*: (US. n. synon.) Used by the US Air Force in place of the word heading because heading contains the word head, the saying of which is a self imposed social taboo. Skulling cf. Cranium, Container
Cranium*: (US. synon.) Used by US Air Force in place of the word head (the saying of which is a self imposed social taboo). cf. Cranium aspect, Container, Skulling
Crank it round: (v.) To obtain maximum angular rate of change when turning. Hoik/Hoyk
Crap out: (v.) To be the loser in a specific situation or end up with the unfavorable option.
Crash Comic: (n.) A crash investigation report.
Crash div: (n.) A very ugly member of the opposite sex used as a reserve if one does not manage to successfully win the affection of a better looking one.
Crinkle : (adj.) Description of someone who has become obviously angry or upset. Usually used to provoke further anger. May be accompanied by annoying hand gesture.
Crock of hoop/shit*: (adj.) Something that massively displeases the speaker.
Crump*: (adj.) 1. A sudden spate of unserviceable aircraft. 2. A particularly heavy landing.
Crunch*: (v.) To perform a calculation.. cf. Maths in public
Cuff it: (v.) Rely on one’s instinctive knowledge to complete a task. Wing it
Cummerbunds & waistcoats: (sim.) It makes no difference which you choose because they will both yield the same result. Six of one, Swings and roundabouts, Six and two threes
Cumulo-granitus: (n.) The ground esp. when obscured by cloud. It has a PK=1
Cut to the chase: (v.) To stop verbalising, and highlight the facts immediately pertinent to the situation.
(n.) The nominated person within a group who is responsible for the collection of currency (contributed to equally by all members in the group) with which to buy alcoholic beverages for the group. cf. Kitty, The cat
(v.) To destroy something, from the catagorisation of damaged aircraft (5 being a write off), particularly a toilet. cf. Trap
(v.) Revisit the a previous topic of conversation.
1. (adj.) Unable to get onto the internet or a telephone network.
2. (n.) Said to describe someone who talks so much that one is unable to get a word in edgeways.